How to write a kickass essay with ½ the stress
A kickass ppt by wittacism
Find out what your teacher wants
- get the assignment prompt and break it down into its individual parts
- this becomes your skeleton for your essay
Don’t start with the introduction paragraph
- seriously this is a great way of stumping yourself ten minutes into the writing process
- you’re trying to write an intro for a paper that doesn’t exist yet???
- start with the first body paragraph
Your awesome body paragraphs
- the cool thing about the essay is that you pretty much get to tell people what to think
- don’t hold back
- your name is already on the top of the page
- so whatever you say
- try to really mean it
- the conclusion is like the end of a 30 second commercial where they hold the product up at the end just in case you forgot you were watching a Hot Pockets commercial
- hold up all your arguments for the audience one more time
- just in case they forgot what they just read
- now that you have some kickass body paragraphs and a conclusion, rewrite your conclusion in introduce your topic
- notice how its 300x easier to introduce something AFTER you’ve written it
- slap a badass thesis statement on the end of your intro
Badass thesis statements
- remember that skeleton we made in slide 2?
- get it back out
- make a single sentence that talks about all those points
- it’s totally cool to write a sentence that says, “In this essay, I argue that…”
- then just list those things
- quotes are a great way to make yourself look credible and to add length to your paper
- lets be honest, no one actually wants to write 2,000 words
- you need to talk before and after a quote
- tell people who you’re quoting
- tell people why they should care
- fun fact: Microsoft Word’s citation maker is literally the scum of the earth
- never ever use it
- use citationmachine.net instead
- or make your own
- (it takes about the same amount of time with a lil’ practice)
- go get yourself a milkshake
- because you have a rough draft, my friend
- be proud of yourself
(Note: all text copied word-for-word, with errors intact.)
It’s essay writing season for tons of students!
After being a college writing tutor for over a year, I thought I would share my advice with all you awesome people on tumblr. This is how I write essays, but if you’ve got more tips, feel free to add them below.
Happy writing. You can do it!
This is actually brilliant.
Ответ получили через двенадцать минут. Все десять присутствовавших при этом человек в напряженном ожидании молчали, когда вдруг заработавший принтер выдал им открытый текст: шифр был взломан. ТРАНСТЕКСТ вскрыл ключ, состоявший из шестидесяти четырех знаков, за десять с небольшим минут, в два миллиона раз быстрее, чем если бы для этого использовался второй по мощности компьютер АНБ.
Тогда бы время, необходимое для дешифровки, составило двадцать лет.